zigguratbuilder (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} zigguratbuilder) wrote,@ 2006-01-30 11:11:00 |
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One penultimate bit on Satoru...
...my friend who died the other day. Just got word from friends that it was natural: Satoru always had a bit of anemia and a weak heart (he took some medication for that), and it was a cold day when he died: He was found in between the walk from his home to his workspace, about 100 meters apart. It wasn't suicide.
It still fucking sucks that he died, but for me (and a lot of his friends) who were standing on pins and needles waiting to hear more... it came as a relief. We all were like, "Deep down, we wasn't the kind of guy who would do that", but he had been under stress lately, and all of us are feeling a little guilty that we assumed it. Oh well, in a country where suicide outnumbers traffic accidents over three to one, and is one the leading causes of untimely death, it's easy to jump to such conclusions (Also, Satoru loved traditional Japense lit, which is a litany of Male Authors Who Wrote Well and Suddenly/Unsuddenly Committed Suicide).
I know that Satoru was working really hard on numerous publications, doing editing for famous contemporary ("not dead") philosophers and the like for journals, working on a number of personal projects (magazines, manga, blogs, philosophical reviews, indie music and comics, etc)... I'm sure that it put a lot of strain on his health. But he lived and died doing what he loved most: Creating products of unalienated labor, and reflective thinking about the world around him.
Here was his blog on Japanese junk culture that he did for a while in English (under his pseudonym Harukiko):
http://mnemorandom.blogspot.com/
And the English page for his circle (club) of indie light-porn manga producers:
http://www2.odn.ne.jp/~cdg96100/hom
The shock is still there, because I'm not in Japan and all that, and saw him not 3 months ago (and he seemed fine: Doing work, hanging with friends, visiting the Maid Cosplay Cabaret where apparently he was Mister Big, etc). When I think about the various things that we were working so closely on, that's when I miss him the most:
* He introduced me to all sorts of stuff, including all those crazy Japanese RPGs that I started getting into (he himself was a huge Call of Cthulhu fan, I even ended up getting him that leatherbound 75th anniversary edition tome for hs birthday one year). He brought me to my first Japanese gaming convention (one event dedicated to playing one game, Tokyo NOVA, a Japanese narrativist Cyberpunk game). He introduced my to Tenra Bansho Zero, and was helping me on some cultural translation bits. That project's now set back a couple months because he was excellent and meticulous in his research and explanation of the roots of various cultural influences in that game. When the game finally comes out, I'm dedicating it to him.
* He brought me to the Komiket, the largest comic convention on the planet, a few times. The convention itself is all about indie comics and the like, but on one of the days, in a certain area, all these indie RPG publishers came out of the woodwork to sell and share their indie games or rules supplements. Because of Satoru, I was able to get my hands on that Romance-Comedy RPG whose rules are based on Call of Cthulhu, including SAN loss for relationships and stress.
* He was also helping gather contacts to get art for Ben's upcoming anime-inspired game Bliss Stage, and took an active interest in it. No one else I know has their fingers in the underground manga industry like Satoru did. He was like the Vincent Baker of indie manga.
Tonight's his wake, tomorrow is his funeral. I have to get some preparations together tonight (traditional things: Traditional "I'm sorry" letter, traditional phone call, traditional correspondences with mutual aquaintences, etc), so I'll be offline after I get off work.
And thanks everyone for your condolences. The horrible/weird seeming thing is that i'm not taking it too hard. My mother died, too, back in 97 and it took a long time for that to set in, but it did in a weird way that didn't cause a lot of wailing and pain. In this case it's kinda the same, and I even became a little ligther when I found out that it was natural. I don't know if it's just 'being jaded' or 'acceptance' or what. I'm certainly no "hard as nails" type, but I've always been weird when it comes to death and loss.
-Andy
...my friend who died the other day. Just got word from friends that it was natural: Satoru always had a bit of anemia and a weak heart (he took some medication for that), and it was a cold day when he died: He was found in between the walk from his home to his workspace, about 100 meters apart. It wasn't suicide.
It still fucking sucks that he died, but for me (and a lot of his friends) who were standing on pins and needles waiting to hear more... it came as a relief. We all were like, "Deep down, we wasn't the kind of guy who would do that", but he had been under stress lately, and all of us are feeling a little guilty that we assumed it. Oh well, in a country where suicide outnumbers traffic accidents over three to one, and is one the leading causes of untimely death, it's easy to jump to such conclusions (Also, Satoru loved traditional Japense lit, which is a litany of Male Authors Who Wrote Well and Suddenly/Unsuddenly Committed Suicide).
I know that Satoru was working really hard on numerous publications, doing editing for famous contemporary ("not dead") philosophers and the like for journals, working on a number of personal projects (magazines, manga, blogs, philosophical reviews, indie music and comics, etc)... I'm sure that it put a lot of strain on his health. But he lived and died doing what he loved most: Creating products of unalienated labor, and reflective thinking about the world around him.
Here was his blog on Japanese junk culture that he did for a while in English (under his pseudonym Harukiko):
http://mnemorandom.blogspot.com/
And the English page for his circle (club) of indie light-porn manga producers:
http://www2.odn.ne.jp/~cdg96100/hom
The shock is still there, because I'm not in Japan and all that, and saw him not 3 months ago (and he seemed fine: Doing work, hanging with friends, visiting the Maid Cosplay Cabaret where apparently he was Mister Big, etc). When I think about the various things that we were working so closely on, that's when I miss him the most:
* He introduced me to all sorts of stuff, including all those crazy Japanese RPGs that I started getting into (he himself was a huge Call of Cthulhu fan, I even ended up getting him that leatherbound 75th anniversary edition tome for hs birthday one year). He brought me to my first Japanese gaming convention (one event dedicated to playing one game, Tokyo NOVA, a Japanese narrativist Cyberpunk game). He introduced my to Tenra Bansho Zero, and was helping me on some cultural translation bits. That project's now set back a couple months because he was excellent and meticulous in his research and explanation of the roots of various cultural influences in that game. When the game finally comes out, I'm dedicating it to him.
* He brought me to the Komiket, the largest comic convention on the planet, a few times. The convention itself is all about indie comics and the like, but on one of the days, in a certain area, all these indie RPG publishers came out of the woodwork to sell and share their indie games or rules supplements. Because of Satoru, I was able to get my hands on that Romance-Comedy RPG whose rules are based on Call of Cthulhu, including SAN loss for relationships and stress.
* He was also helping gather contacts to get art for Ben's upcoming anime-inspired game Bliss Stage, and took an active interest in it. No one else I know has their fingers in the underground manga industry like Satoru did. He was like the Vincent Baker of indie manga.
Tonight's his wake, tomorrow is his funeral. I have to get some preparations together tonight (traditional things: Traditional "I'm sorry" letter, traditional phone call, traditional correspondences with mutual aquaintences, etc), so I'll be offline after I get off work.
And thanks everyone for your condolences. The horrible/weird seeming thing is that i'm not taking it too hard. My mother died, too, back in 97 and it took a long time for that to set in, but it did in a weird way that didn't cause a lot of wailing and pain. In this case it's kinda the same, and I even became a little ligther when I found out that it was natural. I don't know if it's just 'being jaded' or 'acceptance' or what. I'm certainly no "hard as nails" type, but I've always been weird when it comes to death and loss.
-Andy
